March reads: Trans Rights Readathon books

The Trans Rights Readathon is March 17-31, and I've tried to read at least a couple of books for it each year ever since I heard about it. There's a bingo with prompts you can follow, but I didn't really look at them. Here are my TRR books for this year. Still no cover images as Google/Blogger continues to be stupid and act like they can't add cover by url when they could just fine last month.

 

George/Melissa by Alex Gino - earlier middle grade, thrifted paperback. Own Voices (trans author)

George is a closeted trans girl who hates when people refer to her as a boy. Her fourth grade class has read and is putting on a play of Charlotte's Web, and George desperately wants to be Charlotte—but only girls can try out for the part. The way George is able to be true to herself and come out to the people closest to her as Melissa made me so happy! I used both her names in my review as the book refers to her as George for most of it; the book was originally titled George (as my copy is), but it has recently been re-released with the title Melissa. TW for transphobia (including from Melissa's mother, who eventually comes around), dysphoria, bullying, and sexism/gender roles stuff. ★★★★

Both Can Be True by Jules Machias - later middle grade, thrifted paperback. Own Voices (trans author)

Ash has recently had to switch middle schools after getting bullied for being genderqueer. They're in girl mode but feel nervous about their impending boy mode: will people understand and accept them? Is their dad right about how they should pick a side? Daniel is dealing with his parents' separation and criticism from his family for being an overly emotional boy who cries at everything. He impulsively steals a dog that was supposed to be put down at the vet's office where he volunteers and turns to his photography class classmate, Ash, for help taking care of the dog and finding it a home. The 13 year olds like-like each other, but as Ash drifts into boy mode, will Daniel still like them? I felt for and rooted for these kids, and was so happy for them as they learned to embrace the things other people criticized them for. I wish I could punch Ash's dad, though. TW for transphobia, bullying (including physical), dysphoria, terrible parents, sick animals, animal death mentions, and sexism/gender roles stuff. ★★★★

 

Julián Is a Mermaid by and illustrated by Jessica Love - picture book borrowed from my library

I was at work thinking about what to read next for the TRR, and remembered my work library has this picture book (I had previously used it in a book display for Latine Heritage Month). Julián is a small child (fiveish?) who goes with their abuela on the subway and sees some women dressed up as mermaids. They imagine themselves being underwater with colorful fish as a beautiful mermaid with long hair. At home, they grab things from around the house to dress up, and tell their abuela, "I am a mermaid!" She gives Julián a necklace for their costume and takes them to the ocean-themed parade, where they march among the other mermaids and sea creatures. This book has lovely, colorful art and Afrolatine rep. I was happy that Abuela accepted Julián, but found it hard to believe that a latina abuela wouldn't lecture their grandchild about making a mess in the house, especially ripping the fronds out of a fern and pulling a curtain down (maybe it happened off-page lol). Given the art, Julián seems like a trans girl to me, although no terminology is used; I've used they/them pronouns for this reason. I'm not sure if this book is OwnVoices, as there is little personal information in the author's bio. ★★★★

Book Review: Ophelia After All by Racquel Marie

Ophelia Rojas knows what she likes: her best friends, Cuban food, rose gardening, and boys – way too many boys. Her friends and parents make fun of her endless stream of crushes, but Ophelia is a romantic at heart. She couldn’t change, even if she wanted to.

So when she finds herself thinking more about cute, quiet Talia Sanchez than the loss of a perfect prom with her ex-boyfriend, seeds of doubt take root in Ophelia’s firm image of herself. Add to that the impending end of high school and the fracturing of her once-solid friend group, and things are spiraling a little out of control. But the course of love—and sexuality—never did run smooth. As her secrets begin to unravel, Ophelia must make a choice between clinging to the fantasy version of herself she’s always imagined or upending everyone’s expectations to rediscover who she really is, after all.

I put off reading Ophelia After All because I immediately knew, upon reading the synopsis, that the book would be very important to me. Ophelia is half Cuban like me and has the same last name as me (her dad even has the exact same name as my dad!), and she's always crushing on boys and longing for romance and Love™.  In the book Ophelia struggles with her crush on a girl, ignoring or excusing away her past attraction to girls, and resenting the childish and heteronormative image her loved ones have of her, fearing they'll no longer love her if/when she breaks out of that box. Honestly so real. Ophelia's freaking out about her not-straightness is probably how I would have handled it at her age. 

Ophelia has a big diverse group of friends, whom I mostly all liked at varying levels. Each friend had a different dynamic with Ophelia; she develops closer friendships with Talia (Afro-Puerto Rican) and Wesley (Korean American). I especially liked the latina amiga bonding between Talia and Ophelia. There's a love triangle within the friend group that is very dramatic, and it's annoying for the friends outside of it. There's also drama about who's asking who to prom. I thought it was really sweet that Ophelia made corsages and boutonnieres out of her roses for all her friends and their dates for prom. Ophelia was too prone to avoidance when it came to her problems, which was relatable and understandable, but obviously made things worse and was annoying to read.

Spoilers, highlight to read: I was shocked when Ophelia didn't end up with Talia. I really felt that Talia liked her back. It was honestly such a twist for me, because we're seeing it through Ophelia's romcom lens so it felt that way. I love that very few of her friends ended up being straight, and I like that 1 friend was asexual and 1 friend was aromantic. I know aroace people exist, but I think it helped differentiate the two identities (especially for those new to the concepts). I wish I'd had a group of friends that tight-knit (and queer lol) in high school, and I wish I had an LGBTQ+ center near me like the one in the book. The main/only thing I disliked in the book (well, the teenage dating drama got a bit much sometimes) was that, when Ophelia's mom hears that her daughter dumped her drink on one of her (male) students, she immediately demands an explanation (fair) and wants Ophelia to apologize to the guy without knowing what happened (unfair!!). Like, obviously when a girl dumps her drink on a guy she doesn't know, it's because he said or did something inappropriate to her! But Ophelia's mom was immediately #teamdouchebagstudent and acted like Ophelia's action could jeopardize her job or something. I could see the apprehension if the guy had been like the son of the department chair or something, but he was just some guy, and Mom should have been on her daughter's side anyway. Why did she just assume the worst of Ophelia? Supposedly they had been really close, but the mom's behavior wasn't characteristic of that. It disappointed me. I did love that Wesley's parents were so supportive of him that they proudly displayed ace flags in their home and offices!!

I liked Ophelia as a character and think it's adorable that every item of clothing she owns has flowers on it. I liked the story despite finding some parts of it challenging, and would recommend it to anyone who identifies with any part of the story. I wish I'd had this book in high school. I'm so glad I bought and read this story, and even if Ophelia Rojas isn't exactly like Michelle Rojas, she's a part of me now.

Score: 4 out of 5 stars
Read in: June 20
From: Bookshop.org
Status: keeping

See my aesthetics moodboard for Ophelia After All!

Representation: Cuban American, 2nd generation American (children of immigrants), questioning, queer, sapphic, biracial (dad is Cuban, mom is Irish American), bisexual, Afrolatina, Puerto Rican, masculine of center female character, Pakistani American, asexual, Korean American, aromantic, Black, fat, tbh Ophelia gives me neurodivergent vibes with her roses and romance obsessions

Cover notes: I love this cover; it is perfect. I feel like it perfectly captures Ophelia, down to her adorable freckles. 

Trigger warnings: homophobia, internalized homophobia, a character's homophobic family rejects her, closeted character fears rejection, a very minor character makes racist, sexist and homophobic remarks (including the D slur); a character kisses another character without asking/checking for consent first, mood outburst from teen male character that scares his female BFF (not actually violent), exhausting "straight" love triangle

Book Review: How Moon Fuentez Fell in Love With the Universe by Rachel Vasquez Gilliland

When her twin sister reaches social media stardom, Moon Fuentez accepts her fate as the ugly, unwanted sister hidden in the background, destined to be nothing more than her sister’s camerawoman. But this summer, Moon also takes a job as the “merch girl” on a tour bus full of beautiful influencers and her fate begins to shift in the best way possible.

Most notable is her bunkmate and new nemesis, Santiago Phillips, who is grumpy, combative, and also the hottest guy Moon has ever seen.

Moon is certain she hates Santiago and that he hates her back. But as chance and destiny (and maybe, probably, close proximity) bring the two of them in each other’s perpetual paths, Moon starts to wonder if that’s really true. She even starts to question her destiny as the unnoticed, unloved wallflower she always thought she was.

Could this summer change Moon’s life as she knows it?

My friend S gave me this book for Christmas (we have a habit of accidentally giving each other gifts way after the events they were for), so I read it a week or so after I got it. I mentally put every latine kids' and young adult book in my to read list, so I was happy to receive this book. It's so great how there's so much more latine representation now than there was when I was a teen. I only remember one or two YA books with latine protagonists, and one was about undocumented immigration and the other may have been about gangs. I feel like nearly everything else that I read had white protagonists. I was on board for body positivity and tsundere pairings, but this book really blew me away. 

Non-spoilery summary: Moon overcomes her trauma and low self-esteem to come out from her sister's shadow and let herself find love with a hot guy who does the same. This book celebrates food, spirituality, art, and finding the beauty in the world and in yourself. I very much enjoyed reading this book and highly recommend it.

~

Spoilers below, because I'm incapable of talking about a book without talking about everything. For trigger warnings, see the list at the end of this post.

Moon and Star are fraternal twins who were raised by their narcissistic, fatphobic, ashamed of her heritage, looks-obsessed, militant Catholic, religiously, verbally, and physically abusive mother. True to narcissistic parent form, thin, beautiful, white-passing Star is the favorite/golden child, and plus-size, brown-skinned Moon is the scapegoat. (Weird theme to have for January, right? I swear it's accidental.) Strangers ignoring Moon to gawk at and beg Star for her signature/a selfie cements Moon's low self-esteem. Seeking the love she doesn't get at home from boys, Moon accidentally acquires a Reputation and incurs the wrath of her mother. Moon and Star are close, but when Moon begins to be seen and acknowledged for her art while on the influencer tour, Star cannot handle not being the only one in the spotlight and sabotages her. There is a happy ending, but it's realistic. I loved Moon, felt for her, and rooted for her. I'm glad she was able to get everything she deserved.

On to the love interest. Santiago is a really hot buff guy a year or so older than Moon, whose grumpy demeanor and chip on his shoulder instantly annoy her. A misheard conversation makes him 'dislike' her. Lots of attraction, "nooo I'm supposed to hate him!!" thirsting, fun cute flirty banter, and cooking and sharing meals together (Santiago is a world-class cook) take them from enemies to lovers. This was very fun to read, even if I wanted to smack them in the beginning. Moon and Santiago's insecurities are similar and cause them to withdraw from/get mad at the other at various times, usually also due to misunderstandings. Santiago's older brother is the inventor of the Instagram-like app that Star and the influencers create content on, and is also very attractive and rich. Consequently, Santiago is used to people overlooking him or using him to get to his brother. Santiago is missing a hand and is used to dealing with microaggressions and ableism from people; that is his source of low self-esteem. He and Moon bond over the "in their more famous siblings' shadows" thing and over their similar trauma from losing a loved one in a car accident. Oh, and also delicious food (which Santiago is a snob about). Like yes, their relationship is very YA-ish, but it's also realistic and wonderful because they have to deal with and overcome their insecurities and traumas in order to let themselves fall in love.

Other random stuff I want to talk about: 

Star's type of influencing is being a "religious model". Wut. Like she'd post pictures of herself with a bible verse. It makes no sense and is kind of hilarious because one of the first scenes we meet her in, she's in a bikini at the beach to take pictures for her account. Much Christian so spiritual wow. At one point she's blessing her fans and putting her hands on their heads like the pope?? LMAO

Moon loves flowers and does flower/plant/rock art, which she photographs and turns into tarot cards, something she keeps from her mother because she knows she wouldn't approve (Christians consider tarot cards to be demonic). Thanks to influence from her bruja-y aunt, she's getting more into pre-Christian/pre-Columbus types of spirituality and belief from her LatAm indigenous heritage. It's understandable that she would, as her mother's traditional Catholicism is used to shame and abuse. Even their priest is a huge judgy bitch to Moon. I did like how Moon pushes back as best she can against the shitty stuff she's been taught, and stands up to people when they're inappropriate or racist to others. She's working on standing up for herself too.

The women in Moon and Star's family are subject to a curse called La Raiz: after the first time they've had sex, flying insects are drawn to and surround/cover them. Moon is distressed by and ashamed of this, as she sees it as a physical manifestation of her "sluttiness" and failings (plus, yikes, bugs). This isn't really addressed, but I think it's not necessarily a curse. Moon says that sometimes the insects come when she's by herself out in nature creating her art, and the bugs surrounded her when she's engrossed in it. Also, when Moon sees Star making out with fellow influencer Bella, fireflies surround them too (Star says she hasn't had sex, but it's not stated whether she slept with Bella. I'm leaning on the side of she didn't). I believe the so-called "curse" is actually drawn to love, and the reason Mrs. Fuentez says she trapped the curse in a jar and is therefore immune is because she is a psychopath incapable of love, so it never happened to her. In my opinion, the "curse" is a manifestation of the immense spiritual power and magic that the women in Moon and Star's family are capable of. Moon knows how to use tarot cards and do obsidian mirror divination from her aunt, and she starts selling her tarot card decks. La Raiz and Moon's abilities give this book a magical realism label, in my opinion.

Did your jaw drop, spoilers reader, when you saw that Star kisses a girl? Mine did! It's kind of satisfying and funny because Star spends the entire book being this super-Christian little goody two-shoes Catholic, all judging Moon for having slept with guys, and it turns out she's queer! Bella is a makeup influencer, and she and Star met at a different influencer event the previous year; they clearly had a fling that didn't end well (my money is on Star having freaked out due to internalized homophobia). Because Star gets all weird when Bella is mentioned, Moon assumes they're nemeses. lol  This isn't delved into as much as my Christian queer ass would have liked, but that makes sense since this is Moon's story, not Star's. I would actually love a companion book with Star's point of view, since I want to really delve into how she dealt with her attraction to Bella and falling in love with her as a conservative Catholic. We get the idea from this book that Star was in denial about being queer/in love with Bella and chose to ignore it until the kiss. I felt for her, despite her repeated bitchiness, and it's clear being the golden/favorite child did not inoculate her from her mother's abuse and expectations. 

Moon has body image issues due to her mother's constant fatphobic verbal abuse. It's clear that much of the mother's hatred and abuse of Moon is because she looks like her (brown skin, tendency towards curviness). Moon is a size 16, which, lack of size standardization in the fashion industry aside, is just barely the first size in plus-sizing. That's only one size bigger than I am. It also turns out that Moon is not fat and ugly but rather curvy and beautiful (and has low self-esteem). That's... kind of a pet peeve for me, and I'm not even in the fat community. See the fourth paragraph in this other book review to see what I think about that. Obviously people can be and are fatphobic to size 16 individuals, and we are always more critical about ourselves than others are of us, but like... sigh. 

Anyway, fantastic book that broke my heart and inspired me and will stay with me for a long time. Highly recommended. Rachel Vasquez Gilliland, turn this book into a series so I can keep hanging out with Moon?

Score: 4 out of 5 stars
Read in: January 19
From: Christmas gift from a friend
Status: keeping tentatively

See my aesthetics moodboard for How Moon Fuentes Feel in Love with the Universe!

Cover notes: I like the purple, flowers and moon on the cover, of course. I think it's dreamy and fine for the book. Not sure about the lavender background with the circle of night sky at the top, suggesting she's inside of a lavender cone for some reason? The illustration more or less depicts how I see Moon.

Trigger warnings: parental abuse, physical abuse, verbal abuse, emotional abuse, religious abuse, parent throws knives at teenaged child, controlling parent, narcissistic parent, neglect, off-page past suicide, off-page past death from car accident, off-page past loss of limb from car accident, slut-shaming, bullying, creepy adult man gropes teenage girl, creepy adult men hit on teenage girls, street harassment, racism, xenophobia, colorism, fatphobia, abusive parent controls/restricts what her children eat, mental illness, ableism, sexism, linked aquaphobia and gephyrophobia due to past trauma, parental favoritism, insects and bugs show up in this book a lot, internalized homophobia, on-page sex scenes, underage sex, bad sex, a character experiences hunger, food restriction, lovingly detailed descriptions of food and eating

Rest of non-HC childrens' books of 2022

I read Bravo! Poems About Amazing Hispanics back in September for Hispanic Heritage Month. It was purchased from Book Outlet. This brightly colored picture book contains short poem-bios of notable Hispanic figures from history (many of which I had not heard about) written by Margarita Engle and illustrated by Rafael Lopez. I've enjoyed every book I've read from Engle and know her to be a notable Hispanic author of Hispanic books for kids. This was no exception, and I learned a lot from this book, and want to learn more about the people in it.  Highly recommended. 5 stars, keeping.  Trigger warnings (that I remember): racism, discrimination, poverty, sexism, injustice

 

Another purchase from Book Outlet, Viva Frida is a dreamy picture book of/on/about Frida Kahlo. It's not really a biography as much as it is a book celebrating Frida, her aesthetic and imagination. It's written by Yuyi Morales, who has created many beautiful latine picture books, and the illustrations are actually pictures taken by Tim O'Meara of Yuyi's beautifully styled marionette puppets of Frida, Fulang Chang (Frida's monkey), the iconic Frida deer, etc. There are a few traditional illustrations for the dream aspects which are by Yuyi. This was a lovely, dreamy celebration of Frida and I enjoyed it. 4 out of 5 stars. No trigger warnings that I can think of, except dolls/marionettes

I hadn't bothered to put this in my reading spreadsheet, but I also bought and read another Frida kids' book from Book Outlet, per my goal to own every book about Frida Kahlo. A Parrot in the Painting: The Story of Frida Kahlo and Bonito is an early reader book for like first graders. It's a fictionalized story of Bonito, Frida's parrot, trying to think of things to do that would make Frida paint him. She'd painted her other pet animals but not him. It's a cute story that kids might enjoy. I may give this one to my nephew when he's old enough. No star grade. No trigger warnings except possibly for birds and animals, owning exotic pets (in the 1940s)

 

Okay, that's it, since the rest of the picture books I read were from HarperCollins or its subsidiaries, and the strike is ongoing.

Book Review: The Brief Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao by Junot Diaz

Oscar is a sweet but disastrously overweight ghetto nerd who—from the New Jersey home he shares with his old world mother and rebellious sister—dreams of becoming the Dominican J.R.R. Tolkien and, most of all, finding love. But Oscar may never get what he wants. Blame the fukú—a curse that has haunted Oscar’s family for generations, following them on their epic journey from Santo Domingo to the USA. Encapsulating Dominican-American history, The Brief Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao opens our eyes to an astonishing vision of the contemporary American experience and explores the endless human capacity to persevere—and risk it all—in the name of love.

As you know, I'm reading solely Hispanic/Latine books for Hispanic Heritage Month. This one had been on my radar ever since it blew up in the late 2000s. I bought it from a thrift store a few years ago and I hadn't read it until now. The thing about non-children's (and even some children's) Latine books is that I know they're going to talk about sad and hard things, because the reason we're Latin America is because of colonization and all the hard things that entails. There isn't a single LatAm country that isn't still feeling the effect of colonization. Diaz realizes this, and the narrator realizes this, and so we are told not just Oscar's story, not just his family's story, but the Dominican Republic's story, including the long shadow of Trujillo. Oscar and his family's stories are impossible to tell apart from that. 

For this book ostensibly being about Oscar's life, we don't dwell on it much. Oscar grew up steeped in machismo and was a pint-size Casanova until he got his heart broken when he was 7. He discovered science fiction and fantasy soon afterward, and became the kind of geek who says "hail and well met" unironically to obviously non-geeky people. Oscar's weight gain, desperation, depression, low self esteem, not being able to see women as people, and heavy incel energy keep him from finding love or getting laid. Like the narrator, Oscar's roommate Yunior, you want to shake him by the shoulders. Snap out of it! It is difficult to understand an undateable person's despair and loneliness if you have not experienced it yourself. We are told nearly from the beginning that Oscar dies young. It is not from his suicide attempt, but being murdered after falling in love with a taken woman.

Oscar's sister Lola is a Dominican goth and the only daughter, which should give you a window into her suffering. Her mother is incredibly cruel to her, and she rebels by cutting out the criada stuff and then running away. She's the nicest to Oscar, and has a short thing with Yunior at one point. I felt for her, as hers was not an easy life. I know she's not real but I really want her to be happy. She ends up with a husband and kids, but we don't learn about them.

Beli is Oscar & Lola's mother, and her life is harder than her children's put together. Her family is assassinated by Trujillo's people for a minor reason, and she's basically a slave as a small child until her father's distant cousin adopts her and acts as her mother and as Lola & Oscar's grandmother. Beli becomes very attractive and curvaceous during puberty, incurring lots of male attention, including that of a married gangster she falls in love with. His wife has her beaten in the same cane fields her son will be beaten and killed in years later, but she's saved by a guardian spirit mongoose. She's sent to the US to escape, and meets her husband and has her children there. She gets breast cancer later, but outlives her son. She loves her children, but her hardships made her a hard person.

The writing in this book is superb, lyrical and slang-y and conversational. There's a lot of Spanglish and untranslated Spanish words, so I feel like you can't really get this book if you don't speak Spanish. There's probably stuff I didn't get because I'm not Dominican. This book has a lot of footnotes, especially in the beginning. I like footnotes so I don't mind this. There's constant N-word use, which seems to be part of Dominican American slang (used the way I use 'dude'). There's also mention of racism against Haitians (which is wild to me because they're both on the same fucking island. How are you going to hate your sibling-neighbors.). While it was difficult to read, this book was just so interesting and well-written that I couldn't put it down. I literally read it at work instead of working, which I never do. This book's Wikipedia page has a good breakdown of the themes, motifs and parallels in the stories. I learned a lot about Dominican history and the Trujillo regime, which I hadn't known much about.

I want to talk about the misogyny in this book. Obviously there's a ton of machismo in Latin American countries and culture (reminder: I am latina). Oscar gets tons of praise for being a womanizer in 2nd grade or whatever, and he has an inability to see women as whole people, putting them on a pedestal and getting disappointed when they don't fall in love with him even though he's there. I've mentioned the incel energy, although Oscar doesn't feel like he's owed sex or romance and doesn't hate women. He does have a tendency to stalk them and ignore boundaries. Just about every female character, no matter how glancingly mentioned, has her body and looks discussed in a very specific and objectifying way. Yunior is a cheating womanizer and definitely sees women as objects. He's very flippant about the fact that Trujillo raped whoever he wanted. Both he and Oscar are deeply influenced by the machismo of their culture and upbringing. There's also rape culture, sexual assault, and a lot of talk of very young girls dating (being groomed/statutory raped by) much older men. For example, Beli is 14 or 15 when she gets together with the middle-aged gangster. This was very difficult to read. Junot Diaz has been accused of past sexual assault and sexism. I considered not reading this book, but I felt that I might identify with Oscar (I kind of did). You'll have to make the decision to read this book yourself. 

Trigger warnings: rape and sexual assault, child abuse, murder, characters beaten to death, suicide attempt, grooming, domestic abuse, assassinations, police brutality, misogyny, objectification of women and girls, miscarriage mentions, racism, colorism, genocide mentions, stalking, explicit sex, sexism, slavery (including child slavery), domestic slavery, gun violence, alcohol abuse, whorephobia, infidelity

Score: 4 out of 5 stars
Read in: October 5
From: thrift store
Status: giving away/selling

Book Review: Miss Meteor by Tehlor Kay Mejia & Anna-Marie McLemore

There hasn’t been a winner of the Miss Meteor beauty pageant who looks like Lita Perez or Chicky Quintanilla in all its history.

But that’s not the only reason Lita wants to enter the contest, or her ex-best friend Chicky wants to help her. The road to becoming Miss Meteor isn’t about being perfect; it’s about sharing who you are with the world—and loving the parts of yourself no one else understands.

So to pull off the unlikeliest underdog story in pageant history, Lita and Chicky are going to have to forget the past and imagine a future where girls like them are more than enough—they are everything.

I bought this book because it sounded cute, and I'm always here for Latine and LGBTQ+ rep. While each author writes for each girl (I'm assuming), the book sounded cohesive and kinda like it had been written by just one person. TBH, I was too engrossed in the story to stop and think about that sort of thing. 

Lita (Estrellita) is a sweet and petite sensitive soul who makes friends with cacti and helps her "aunt" with her brujeria (positive). She's kind of a mini pixie dream girl (get it? cuz she's short and quirky) who wears what she wants and rides a little girl's bike. This might be a spoiler, as it's not mentioned in the back of book summary, but it is mentioned within the first three chapters: Lita and Bruja Lupe arrived with the meteor; they are literally extraterrestrial stardust that was launched from the meteor/ite and somehow formed itself into two "human" beings. How it happened and why is not explained; it's very magical realism, although that's the only magical thing in the book. Lita decides to win the Miss Meteor pageant even though she's short, chubby, brown, and knows nothing about beauty pageants. Knowing this, she calls on Chicky and her MM pageant-veteran sisters to help her enter and win the pageant. Craziness ensues, obviously.

Chicky (Chiquita) is an androgynous loner who hides behind her self-cut bangs and sticks out like a sore thumb from her four older hyper-femme sisters as well as their traditional town. The Quintanillas run a really sweet-sounding diner called Selena's (Selena has the same last name as them) that I wish I could eat at. Chicky and Lita used to be best friends when they were younger, until the white popular mean kids' bullying drove them apart. While this is not important to the story, it sticks in my craw: each Quintanilla girl is named after what their great-grandmother dreamed about before they were born. For some ungodly reason, bisabuela dreamed of a different fruit each time, except that with the last one, she dreamed of Chiquita Banana. The older Quintanilla girls are out here named shit like Fresa and Uva. Literally why. This was mad cringy, in my opinion. Why not something normal yet unnecessarily feminine like flowers? Or even gemstones?

Meteor, New Mexico is just as much a character as the girls, with its quirky small-town-ness and yearly cornhole competition-slash-Miss Meteor pageant. The girls' love of their hometown is so strong that you come to love it too. That said, there's a lot of ridiculous racism and homophobia that they have to deal with. Lita gets racist/colorist/sizeist bullying; Chicky gets homophobic bullying. The popular mean girl and guy who bully them the most sadly do not get hit by a car, nor do their racist parents get hit with a train. Alas. There is some comeuppance for them at the end, but not enough. Also, I think it's weird that Miss Meteor is always a white girl. We're literally talking about small towns in New Mexico, which are mostly made up of latines? Hello? Why did no one call out the (undoubtedly white and more well-off) judges for only choosing white girls from the same families each time?

Both girls get love interests, obvi. Chicky surprisingly does not get a female love interest, but a male one: she's pansexual. Junior is an artist and a longtime friend of Chicky's who has always liked her, and she has to overcome her fear of ruining their friendship and truly being seen. Lita's love interest is Cole, a trans guy who is the brother of the main bully girl (yikes). He's also a longtime friend, and Lita has to get over her insecurity about not belonging and challenging the status quo (he's popular, she's not). The romances were cute, and I liked both guys, although I feel like we focus on Junior less than we do on Cole. Cole was honestly my favorite character besides the main girls.

Anyway I liked this book so much! It gave me such a good feeling at the end. I loved the girls and their love interests and their crazy families and the town. God I wish I could eat at Selena's. I definitely recommend the book for its representation and themes. A note: this book was promoted on bookstagram (bookish Instagram) as having bisexual rep, when it actually has pansexual rep. I saw so many posts and videos touting it as bi rep that I wonder if maybe Chicky was originally written to be bi, and the publisher promoted it as such. This is rather irritating because I trusted the posts I saw and read this book for Bisexual Awareness Week, and it wasn't bi. Once again I am deceived. 

Score: 3.5 out of 5 stars
Read in: September 21-22
From: Book Outlet
Status: keeping

Cover notes: I love this cover. The girls' pictures, the cacti, the roses, the beauty stuff, the colors. The cupcake with sliced jalapeños on top is Lita's regular order at Selena's. *affectionately* Gross.

Trigger warnings for this book: homophobic bullying, racist bullying, internalized homophobia, anti-immigrant and anti-latine racism, transphobia, transphobic microaggressions, bullying, underage drinking, underage drunkenness, alcohol, sexism, body shaming, sizeism, fatphobia, internalized fatphobia, internalized sizeism, broken bone(s) from accident, classism, rich people making fun of poor people, bike crash, growing up poor, tokenism, false 'allyship'

Book Review: Cuentos: Tales From the Hispanic Southwest

I was thrilled to find this book at my thrift store, as I am not very familiar with Latinx folklore the way I am with other cultures' stories. Back of book summary below:

Witchcraft and magic and the events of everyday life in the Hispanic villages of New Mexico and southern Colorado flow through this collection of cuentos. Together the tales evoke the rich tradition--the wisdom, customs and values--of the early Spanish Settlers and their descendants.

What this doesn't say, and what the compilers/translators emphasize, is that it's not just the Spanish heritage; it's all of the cultures in the Southwest who are combined in the people and in their stories: Spanish, Mexican, and Native American. You see Mexican Spanish words derived from Aztec used (tecolote, zacate), Native American terms (tata/tatita), as well as terms that are clearly from the local dialect of the time (asina for asi). This is fascinating from a linguistic standpoint, and I recommend those studying Spanish and/or Latin American dialects to read this book. There is a glossary in the back for some of the different terms, which of course I did not find out until I was almost at the end. 

Each tale is told in both Spanish and English, with the Spanish on the left page and English on the right; this makes it a bit annoying to read. I struggled through the Spanish parts because of the archaic terms and dialectal differences, and also because my Spanish reading level never improved past elementary school. I'd say I understood anywhere from 80-99% of the text. The English translations definitely took liberties with the source material. I understand that good translations capture the spirit of the text rather than translating just the specific words directly, but there were way too many changes, many of which didn't make sense. Some changes I could see, as the original tales took it for granted that everyone would automatically know everything referenced in the story, but some things were expanded on in an unnecessary way. Some translation choices actually changed the connotation or story. Some examples: one cuento mentions a somewhat conniving Jewish jeweler, while the English translation doesn't mention he's Jewish at all (because of the antisemitism? This was published in 1980; were people that concerned about antisemitism then? Wouldn't it be the correct thing to leave the antisemitism in?). Another cuento mentions women turning into owls; the English text calls them old women. Yet others ascribed emotions, actions or descriptions to characters etc. that weren't present in the original text. It's just so irresponsible. These are learned writers who should know what they're doing! Bad translations are one of my pet peeves.

You may notice that I didn't include an author; this is because it's a bit muddled. The subtitle states that Juan B. Rael originally collected these oral folktales from Colorado and New Mexico, and Jose Griego & Maestas compiled and adapted them for this book, while Rudolfo A. Anaya (author of Bless Me, Ultima!) is the one who made the English translations. Of course, it's basically impossible to know the sources/authors of these stories, as with oral tradition, each teller can add their own details in every telling.

Some of the stories are very short and are almost like longish jokes with punchlines. These often poke fun of or criticize corrupt priests or selfish rich men. Simple indio/Native American characters often get back at these. Christian and Catholic personages like Jesus, the Virgin Mary, St. Peter, and God often show up and are depicted as characters, sometimes acting human. Death also shows up a lot. I learned there are different versions of death, not just the one skeleton with a scythe. One is called manita muerte, short for little sister (hermanita) death. Some of the stories are unsurprisingly moralistic and Catholic/Christian; others involve people getting rich. These reminded me of fairytales I've read, because of the formerly oral feel and moralistic/getting rich themes. There's one about a guy who saves a snake and is awarded the ability to talk to animals and consequently finds money and gets rich that, apart from the setting and language, could have come from Grimm's (the introduction says it's from the 1001 Arabian Nights, which, fascinating). Instead of the familiar "habia una vez.." beginning, these all begin very plainly with "Habia..." or "Esta era un hombre...", which I found interesting. Almost all of these stories have male protagonists; the only one who kinda has a female protagonist is about a shapeshifting witch who's bested by a man.

Overall, I enjoyed this book and am glad I bought it. I think I'm keeping it, although I'm lending it to my dad next so it might end up at my parents' house. I like learning more about Latinx literary culture. 

Score: 3.5 out of 5 stars
Read in: July 24-August 31
From: Savers thrift store
Status: keeping for now

Cover notes: The cover depicts art from the same artist who drew the inside illustrations. I think it's fine. Death never flies over anyone's house in any of the stories, although they are featured quite often.

Trigger warnings for this book: elder abuse and neglect, child abuse and neglect mentions, anti-indigenous racism, period-typical sexism, gambling addiction, fantasy violence, death, Christianity and Catholicism, church and clergy corruption, thievery, witchcraft, can't think of anything else but if you've read fairy tales and folklore from the 1800s then you know the vibe

Book Review: Postcolonial Love Poem by Natalie Diaz

Uncharacteristically, I bought this book at full price from the McNally-Jackson branch inside the LaGuardia airport before flying out of New York (I had been visiting my sister and her family). Yes characteristically, I did not read it right away as planned, and it sat around in my house and various bookshelves before I finally read it at the end of April. Back of book summary:

Postcolonial Love Poem is an anthem of desire against erasure. Natalie Diaz’s brilliant second collection demands that every body carried in its pages—bodies of language, land, rivers, suffering brothers, enemies, and lovers—be touched and held as beloveds. Through these poems, the wounds inflicted by America onto an indigenous people are allowed to bloom pleasure and tenderness: “Let me call my anxiety, desire, then. / Let me call it, a garden.” In this new lyrical landscape, the bodies of indigenous, Latinx, black, and brown women are simultaneously the body politic and the body ecstatic. In claiming this autonomy of desire, language is pushed to its dark edges, the astonishing dunefields and forests where pleasure and love are both grief and joy, violence and sensuality.

Diaz defies the conditions from which she writes, a nation whose creation predicated the diminishment and ultimate erasure of bodies like hers and the people she loves: “I am doing my best to not become a museum / of myself. I am doing my best to breathe in and out. // I am begging: Let me be lonely but not invisible.” Postcolonial Love Poem unravels notions of American goodness and creates something more powerful than hope—in it, a future is built, future being a matrix of the choices we make now, and in these poems, Diaz chooses love.

This book won the Pulitzer Prize for poetry, and wow I can see why. I had already read a couple of the poems that had been shared on tumblr, and I loved her writing. She's so so good: passionate and angry and grieving and heartfelt and poetic and in love; a master of her craft. This is a short book, but I had to put it away for a couple of days instead of reading it in one sitting because it's so intense. It will stay with me for a long time. In a classic "oh, Michelle" I don't know what I expected given the title way, I was somewhat surprised by the sheer amount of explicit poems about e*ting a woman 0ut in the most poetic, beautiful language. Every couple of poems it was like, oh another one, godspeed Natalie. Although this does raise a point I've read before: we always expect women's poetry to be purely autobiographical, while allowing men to be seen as artists who write whatever they want and are respected. It may very well be that these poems aren't all strictly autobiographical. They all feel deeply personal, though, regardless of whether or not they actually happened in real life. 

Anyway, I loved this and recommend it highly, although of course the poems are often difficult to read (some topics covered include missing & murdered indigenous women, water protestors, America's anti-indigenous history and mentality, etc.). Themes I kept seeing: green, bulls/horns, the land/desert, rivers/water...

Score: 5 out of 5 stars
Read in: April 28-May 2
From: McNally-Jackson, LaGuardia airport branch
Status: keep

Cover notes: The cover features Natalie Diaz herself. She appears to be obscuring her face with her hand, but if you keep looking you'll see one of her eyes peeking out, locked directly on the viewer. Both obscured/hidden and watching. She appears to be wearing indigenous jewelry. I think the cover goes well with the tone of the poetry.

Trigger warnings for this book: missing & murdered indigenous women mentions, suicide mention, drugs and alcohol abuse mentions, anti-indigenous racism (systemic and internalized), violence mentions, police brutality (including towards elders), mental illness mentions, explicit poetic sex act descriptions

Book Review: Pride: A Pride & Prejudice Remix by Ibi Zoboi

I love Jane Austen's books and I love retellings, so I bought this book (probably at Barnes & Noble). It sat on my Austen shelf for years until I read it last week for Black History Month. Book summary:

Zuri Benitez has pride. Brooklyn pride, family pride, and pride in her Afro-Latino roots. But pride might not be enough to save her rapidly gentrifying neighborhood from becoming unrecognizable.

When the wealthy Darcy family moves in across the street, Zuri wants nothing to do with their two teenage sons, even as her older sister, Janae, starts to fall for the charming Ainsley. She especially can’t stand the judgmental and arrogant Darius. Yet as Zuri and Darius are forced to find common ground, their initial dislike shifts into an unexpected understanding.

But with four wild sisters pulling her in different directions, cute boy Warren vying for her attention, and college applications hovering on the horizon, Zuri fights to find her place in Bushwick’s changing landscape, or lose it all.

I really liked this book. I loved picking up on all the twists on the original story (Benitez = Bennet, Charlize = Charlotte, Colin = Mr. Collins). It's actually a pretty close retelling, despite the modern Brooklyn setting. Zuri, who is Dominican and Haitian American, has such a strong, confident voice. She has dreams and goals and writes slam poetry. It was soul-affirming to have a(n Afro)latine protagonist and family star in this book; they all loved each other and were there for each other no matter what. I also loved the Madrina character, who as far as I can tell takes the role of the Bennets' aunt character. She's a warm and loving Boricua Santeria priestess who counsels Zuri on her problems. I didn't think Darius had the same character arc as Mr. Darcy, as his and Zuri's interactions weren't the same as Mr. Darcy's and Lizzie's. He just chilled out some and fixed his face. The first person present tense this book is written in will also put some readers off, but it does keep us firmly in Zuri's viewpoint as she is the narrator. Anyway, I really liked this book and you should read it. 

Cover notes: Please try to find a big, hi-res image of this book cover, because it is gorgeous. It's a tactile bronze scrollwork deal with flowers and vines and such, with the title being spray-painted across. Just lovely. My hardcover has the Darius and Zuri bust portraits facing each other in the endpapers too. 

Score: 4 out of 5 stars
Read in: February 23-24
From: probably Barnes & Noble
Status: tentatively keep

Trigger warnings for this book: a minor's nudes are leaked by an older boy who groomed her, said older boy attempts to groom another young teenaged girl, alcohol use by minors, drunkenness, partying, physical fight, drug dealing mentions, racism mentions, classism, implied colorism, implied respectability politics, teens sneak out of the house to attend parties, police show up briefly

Latinx representation

Study finds films lag significantly in Latino representation

Latina women in films are all maids, immigrants (undocumented or not), gang girls or cholas, spicy and tempestuous, Jennifer Lopez, or all of the above. I'm trying to think of a Latina in movies I could relate to. America Ferrera has come close; she played Carmen in Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants, but her story was not my story. I have yet to watch Real Women Have Curves, but it's on my list.

Representation matters. Ask me why I, a white, blue-eyed, brown-haired girl, never really saw any character I identified with. (Maybe I would feel differently if I had watched Gilmore Girls. Alexis Bledel is a white Argentinian with blue eyes and brown hair and her character loved books. But her character was white.) Ask me why I saw America Ferrera's awkward bespectacled face as Ugly Betty and immediately placed the TV show in the #1 slot in my heart. Ask me why her Mexican apron-wearing, cooking dad and prettier, more popular sister felt so familiar. Ask me why I latched on to Jane the Virgin, with her love of books and dreams of being a writer and the specter of religion haunting her desires. When Jane and her mom and her abuela sang feliz cumpleaños to her son, harmonizing, I burst into tears. My family does that. I had never seen anything on television so close to my personal experiences. I feel uncomfortable when, in TV shows and movies, second and third generation Latinx Americans speak in English to their parents and grandparents while they speak to them in Spanish. I do that to my dad without knowing, and it makes me feel guilty.

Depending on your interpretation, Latinxs have been here since before the United States claimed its independence. J.Lo goes to the gym every day, but she cannot carry us all on her shoulders. Nor should she.