Serial email ebooks and Christmas rereads

I subscribed to Dracula Daily due to peer pressure from tumblr and Twitter, and it was fun to slowly read the book via emails, which sent you the diary entries and letters that make up the book on the day they were "written". It was a fun and unique way to read the book, which I'd read ages before, and I liked seeing the memes and social media posts about it as we all read the book together and chatted about what our good friend Jonathan Harker had written. I don't think I'll do Dracula Daily again, but thanks to their recommendations I've subscribed to other ebooks-via-email subscriptions. Truly this is the best way to use Substack. 3.5 stars. Trigger warnings: blood (including consumption of), gore, body horror, off-page child murder, child endangerment, vampires kidnapping/feeding on children and adults, death, wolves/large dogs, various forms of horror

 

One of DD's recommendations was for Dickens December, which split up A Christmas Carol into equal-ish segments that were emailed out December 1 to 26. I also enjoyed reading ACC this way; I find the short email every day prompts more reflection than just reading the book in one gulp, which is what I usually do. I like to reread A Christmas Carol for Christmas anyway, and this was a fun way to do it. 4 stars. Trigger warnings: ghosts, supernatural horror, poverty, classism, death, homelessness mentions, prison mentions, a character flirts in a way that would be considered sexual harassment today

 

I reread Christmas with Anne, a compilation of L.M. Montgomery's holiday stories and the Christmas chapters from two Anne of Green Gables books. I reread it every year, and find the stories to be nice and old-fashioned in a comforting way. The non-Anne stories fall into one of three camps: an estranged family is reconciled during the holidays, stuck-up people learn humility due to sharing merry-making with others, or a poor family's children are gifted Christmas in a way they could not have imagined. Others may find the stories repetitive, but I don't mind it, having been inoculated due to repeated readings of the Christmas in My Heart books, which has even more repetitive stories despite being a 40-something book series. I believe this is now out of print, but you may be able to buy an inferior cover version that isn't as nice. 4 out of 5 stars, permanent collection. Trigger warnings: poverty, classism, xenophobia, lookism, fatphobia, sexism, controlling parental figure, death, loss, grief, past child abuse and neglect mentions, 1 brief infertility mention, loneliness, estranged families

 

Another Christmas reread was Jan Brett's picture book The Twelve Days of Christmas, which was a gift from my kindergarten teacher when I was five. It's beautifully, sumptuously illustrated, with lots of lovely details and interpretations of each of the true love's gifts. Truly a picture book to lose yourself in. 5 stars, permanent collection.

picture courtesy of Abebooks

Times it is appropriate to decorate/advertise for holidays

 New Year's Eve/Day

The day of New Year's Eve, if desired. Stores may begin advertising their New Year's Eve decorations on December 20.

Valentine's Day

February 1. The holiday occurs in the middle of the month; that is enough time.

St. Patrick's Day

March 1. Ditto.

Easter

March 18. This one is tricky because Easter floats around on the calendar, so to speak. 

Cinco de Mayo

I actually do not want anyone who isn't Mexican to celebrate this day. It is a thinly-veiled excuse to get hammered and act racist. Celebrating by listening to Mexican music and/or dining at local Mexican-owned restaurants is fine for everyone. Do not celebrate, decorate, or advertise by committing cultural appropriation. Advertising may begin on April 20, but NO ALCOHOL ADVERTISING. Not even Mexican alcohol.

Mother's Day 

May 1, although I don't think anyone actually decorates for this (unless you are having a mother's day party, in which case, the day before or day of is fine). Advertising: April 20. 

Father's Day

May 20 (advertising). No one really decorates for Father's Day. 

Independence Day (Fourth of July) 

Decorating: the last week of June. Advertising: the day after Father's Day.

Halloween

Both decorating and advertising can begin no earlier than October 1. The holiday is at the end of the month; there is no need to decorate or advertise for Halloween in September. Generic fall decorations may be used from September 1 through November 30; explicitly Halloween/spooky-themed decorations must be taken down the first week of November (thanks to Día de los Muertos). A loophole exists thanks to The Nightmare Before Christmas movie; decorate your house with decorations from or inspired by the movie, and it can do double duty for Halloween and Christmas. I don't really like or approve of this, however.

Thanksgiving

Decorating: November 1 for explicitly Thanksgiving-themed decorations (generic fall decorations may be used from September 1 through November 30). Advertising: November 1.

Christmas

Decorating: the day AFTER Thanksgiving is fine, for your personal home. December 1 is preferred. November 1 is NOT acceptable; let fall and Thanksgiving have its due. I wish people would stop acting like people who hold fast to the no-Xmas-decorating-until-after-Thanksgiving rule are joyless fun-suckers; we are merely temperate, principled people who know the value of keeping holidays in their rightful place. Advertising: I don't want to see a single fucking Xmas tree/Santa/present/reindeer/snowperson or hear a single bleeding carol until December 1. I don't give a shit about Black Friday or your bottom line. Everybody knows when Christmas is and when and how to buy Christmas decorations and presents. Advertising interference is not needed. Every year a local radio station starts playing Christmas carols earlier and earlier; last year I emitted a howl of rage when I turned on the radio station on November 15 (NOVEMBER FIFTEEN!!!) to hear fucking Jingle Bells. The madness needs to stop. 

"The Day After Thanksgiving" by Brandon Heath

Christmas decorations can stay up until January 6, Ephiphany/Three Kings' Day.

November and December books

 Yikes, I am so behind on my book blogging. 

A Tale of Two Castles is a book I had on my to read list for a while. I no longer remember where I bought it; I'm guessing I probably got it from Savers or another thrift store; Dollar Tree is another possibility. The book is by Gail Carson Levine, who was one of my favorite authors when I was younger, so I knew it would be good. Despite the title, the book is not a retelling of A Tale of Two Cities, but rather of Puss in Boots. It took me an embarrassingly long time to figure that out; probably halfway through the book at the earliest. The reason for that is because, instead of being told from the perspective of any of the characters in Puss in Boots, it's told from the perspective of an original character. Amazon summary:

Newly arrived in the town of Two Castles, Elodie unexpectedly becomes the assistant to a brilliant dragon named Meenore--and together, they begin to solve mysteries. 

Their most important case concerns the town’s shape-shifting ogre, Count Jonty Um, who believes someone is plotting against him. Elodie must disguise herself to discover the source of the threat amid a cast of characters that includes a greedy king, a giddy princess, and a handsome cat trainer.

Overall, I thought this book was very good and I enjoyed reading it. This book felt more grounded in its  medieval world than Levine's other fantasies have been, probably because she clearly researched life in the middle ages and peppered her book with factoids. For example, Elodie recounted having to bathe last all the time; her father would go first, then her mother, then their adult permanent guest, then Elodie because she's a child. The bath water, by the time she got to it, would be gray. As someone who is interested in medieval Europe, I very much enjoyed this book and most of its characters (Elodie was constantly talking back and interrupting her elders to the point of being annoying, and the only ahistorical thing is that none of them smacked her for it). I'd highly recommend this book to anyone who likes a fairytale retelling, particularly one of a fairytale that has not already been retold to death. Fans of Karen Cushman's medieval girl books will love this one as well. Amazon just told me that there is a sequel, and I absolutely am going to check it out. 4/5 stars, probably giving away. Trigger warnings for this book: attempted murder, poisonings, animal cruelty & possibly murder, imprisonment, descriptions of medieval European hygiene (humans having fleas etc.), speciesism and prejudice against fantastical creature/person, theft, can't think of any others.  Cover notes: I like everything on this cover except for the portrayal of Elodie. Elodie is a peasant who wore plain peasant garb; she would absolutely not be wearing such a fine dress. I don't like the pinched-looking face they gave her.

 

I reread Christmas with Anne and Other Holiday Stories by L.M. Montgomery, as is my custom each holiday season. 

 

I also read (or reread) a book called Politically Correct Holiday Stories by James Finn Garner. He's also written a couple of Politically Correct fairytale retellings. Basically he puts these famous stories through a politically correct lens, which changes them completely. It's difficult to say whether Garner is poking fun at the patriarchal, Christian-centric, sexist stories or at PC culture; it seems to be both. To give you an example, his Frosty the Snowpersun has the titular character start up a protest movement for snowpurson rights, and they eventually melt under the lights of the television studio where they are being interviewed. Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer (can't remember his politically correct moniker) formed a union with the reindeer so that Santa Claus would give them what they were due. Stuff like that. Relatively amusing, but I won't be keeping this one. 3/5 stars.  Cover notes: Santa & Mrs. Claus are looking out their window at a crowd of elf protesters holding picket signs that are decidedly pro-union and anti-Claus. Kind of funny but they deserve it. Trigger warnings for this book: inclusivity and political correctness mocked; depictions of misogyny, capitalism, sexism and speciesism; character death/melting. Can't think of any others.

November & December books

I decided to just do short book reviews for the 2018 books I hadn't reviewed yet.

Where Am I Now? True Stories of Girlhood and Accidental Fame by Mara Wilson (early November).
I loved Mara Wilson's movies growing up, and she's really funny on social media nowadays, so I bought her memoir from Barnes & Noble and was excited to read it (which means it sat on my bookshelf for a year). While it wasn't the laugh-fest I imagined, I really enjoyed this book. Mara explores her child star status, her struggle with OCD and anxiety, her awkward adolescence, and how the deaths of her mother and Robin Williams impacted her. It was like a window into her life, and I'd like to be friends with her.  ~~~~~ 4/5, keep


 Dandelion Wine by Ray Bradbury (mid-November to early December)
I loved The Martian Chronicles when I read it for a sci fi class, so I bought this book when I came across it in a thrift store. Ray Bradbury has just the loveliest writing; everything he writes is a work of art. This book is a love letter to his midwest childhood in the 1920s, while also mythologizing it and imbuing it with sci fi elements and mystery. Some examples: an old woman who hoards objects from her long life is convinced she has always been an old lady by the local children; an old woman recognizes the love of her life as being reincarnated in his grandson, and a heatstruck boy is brought back to life by bottled air from cold lands, sold by a peddler. The only thing I didn't like about this book was the creepy element of a serial killer, which is treated like high adventure by the boys, and it was just too flippant for me.   ~~~~~ 4/5, probably give away


The Nutcracker by Alexandre Dumas (Christmas eve)
I bought a copy of the Nutcracker story in a beautiful binding from Barnes & Noble. I read the story as a child, although I'm not sure it was the Dumas version. It's pretty weird. This one starts out with the author at a Christmas party at a friend's house. He sneaks away from playing with the kids to take a nap, but wakes up tied to the chair. The kids agree to release him only if he tells him a story, so he tells them "the history of the Nutcracker". It's not at all a story that would entertain children, as it's way too long and tied up in weird bureaucratic and historical details, with the kind of long-winded and rambling writing typical of the 18/19th century. Clara is supposed to be 7 and a half and she's this perfect little lady who is always sweet and kind and acts way older than her age. What's insane to me is that at the end, the Nutcracker marries her after a year has passed. She's only 8 and a half at that point!! So weird.  ~~~~~ 3.5/5, keep

Christmas In My Heart 1 ed. Joe L. Wheeler (Christmas)
Every year Joe L. Wheeler puts out another compilation of Christmas stories from the good old days. Each one has stories from the Victorian era through maybe the 1960s, chock full of adorable precocious children, forlorn but cheerful orphans who find a home, lonely people finding each other, people learning the true meaning of Christmas, separated couples getting back together, and occasionally nice white people helping brown/foreign children. It's all very treacley. At the end of each one is a long sweeping story by Joe L. Wheeler himself that is full of romance between beautiful/handsome Christians and involves either music or books and is bound to give you diabetes. I've read at least four of the CIMH books and they're all the same. My mother gives the new one to my father each year, and we are at volume 27. When will Joe L. Wheeler's reign of terror end?  ~~~~ 3.9/5

Dragons I have appreciated

Apparently today is Appreciate a Dragon Day. Who am I to let this auspicious holiday go unobserved.

• Smaug (from the book, although I tolerate CumberSmaug). He's awful, but he's badass. Never over using gemstones to make armor for his chest and belly!
• as awful as the books are, Saphira (I don't remember her name exactly), the main dragon in the Eragon books. She's cool.
• Mushu from Mulan, of course. 
• I also liked the Great Stone Dragon a lot and have always sorta felt disappointed that he didn't come to life like Mushu did. And when Mulan sits in/under the statue while it rains???? Most badass seat ever
• I feel like I read at LEAST one book where the girl protagonist (a princess usually) befriended the dragon, turning that trope of dragons vs. princesses on its head. I feel like this happened in the Frog Princess books, among others.
• The Reluctant Dragon by Kenneth Grahame. I love that dude; he's the Ferdinand the Bull of dragons.
• The Ice Dragon by George R.R. Martin. This is actually the only thing by him that I've read, and it is lovely and sad.
• EUSTACE WHEN HE WAS A DRAGON omg I knew I was forgetting someone important
• the image of the red and the white dragons from underground fighting each other in The Once and Future King has always stayed with me, but idk if I appreciate them
• I feel like there are scads of other dragons I've read that I'm not remembering
• the most recent dragon book I've read was called The Dragonwatcher's Guide or something. It's a "nonfiction" scrapbook type book for the newbie dragon scholar. I liked it.
• Toothless from How to Train Your Dragon (the movie, I've never read the book)
• Puff the Magic Dragon feels forever