Times it is appropriate to decorate/advertise for holidays

 New Year's Eve/Day

The day of New Year's Eve, if desired. Stores may begin advertising their New Year's Eve decorations on December 20.

Valentine's Day

February 1. The holiday occurs in the middle of the month; that is enough time.

St. Patrick's Day

March 1. Ditto.

Easter

March 18. This one is tricky because Easter floats around on the calendar, so to speak. 

Cinco de Mayo

I actually do not want anyone who isn't Mexican to celebrate this day. It is a thinly-veiled excuse to get hammered and act racist. Celebrating by listening to Mexican music and/or dining at local Mexican-owned restaurants is fine for everyone. Do not celebrate, decorate, or advertise by committing cultural appropriation. Advertising may begin on April 20, but NO ALCOHOL ADVERTISING. Not even Mexican alcohol.

Mother's Day 

May 1, although I don't think anyone actually decorates for this (unless you are having a mother's day party, in which case, the day before or day of is fine). Advertising: April 20. 

Father's Day

May 20 (advertising). No one really decorates for Father's Day. 

Independence Day (Fourth of July) 

Decorating: the last week of June. Advertising: the day after Father's Day.

Halloween

Both decorating and advertising can begin no earlier than October 1. The holiday is at the end of the month; there is no need to decorate or advertise for Halloween in September. Generic fall decorations may be used from September 1 through November 30; explicitly Halloween/spooky-themed decorations must be taken down the first week of November (thanks to Día de los Muertos). A loophole exists thanks to The Nightmare Before Christmas movie; decorate your house with decorations from or inspired by the movie, and it can do double duty for Halloween and Christmas. I don't really like or approve of this, however.

Thanksgiving

Decorating: November 1 for explicitly Thanksgiving-themed decorations (generic fall decorations may be used from September 1 through November 30). Advertising: November 1.

Christmas

Decorating: the day AFTER Thanksgiving is fine, for your personal home. December 1 is preferred. November 1 is NOT acceptable; let fall and Thanksgiving have its due. I wish people would stop acting like people who hold fast to the no-Xmas-decorating-until-after-Thanksgiving rule are joyless fun-suckers; we are merely temperate, principled people who know the value of keeping holidays in their rightful place. Advertising: I don't want to see a single fucking Xmas tree/Santa/present/reindeer/snowperson or hear a single bleeding carol until December 1. I don't give a shit about Black Friday or your bottom line. Everybody knows when Christmas is and when and how to buy Christmas decorations and presents. Advertising interference is not needed. Every year a local radio station starts playing Christmas carols earlier and earlier; last year I emitted a howl of rage when I turned on the radio station on November 15 (NOVEMBER FIFTEEN!!!) to hear fucking Jingle Bells. The madness needs to stop. 

"The Day After Thanksgiving" by Brandon Heath

Christmas decorations can stay up until January 6, Ephiphany/Three Kings' Day.

Pet peeves at work

I wrote this ages ago, well before the pandemic. I haven't worked in person in a regular way at the library for well over a year. We're supposed to start working in-person again in September, which I'm both looking forward to and dreading. Anyway, enjoy.

• when I'm sitting at the reference desk and someone asks for another librarian 
• what am I, chopped liver?!?
• when no one takes me seriously, including students, because I look like a student
• when someone I've been helping with research in the archives asks another librarian for help
• and they totally know I could help them so it's clear they don't want me
• and my colleague doesn't know I've helped them previously so *she* dives into the archives to look for stuff that I totally could've looked for and found 
• and that's very nice of her but it feels like she's doing my job for me, plus I feel guilty since she's already so busy
• and I'm mad at the scholar for going over my head
• especially since it's something they never even asked me for help with!!!
• when people expect me to have an encyclopedic knowledge of eeeeeeeverything in the library. like lol yeah right
• but it bugs me because I also kind of feel like I should know everything we have
• when instructors ask us to do a library visit/instruction session with their class the week of, or, God forbid, the day before their class meets, especially during the busy season
• like yes, we were just totally sitting around twiddling our thumbs waiting for you, this won't inconvenience us at all
• when people dump their crap donate items to us that we totally already have 1000 copies of, but by all means, give us your old junk
• when people assume they can just waltz into the special collections and riffle through our archival holdings themselves. Oh did you go to library school? No? Then you can't. 
• relatedly: when patrons want to access something in the archives and the other librarians just... let them into the off-limits-to-patrons room without even checking with me!!!
• when people LICK THEIR FINGERS to turn pages, especially of archival items!!! *shudder*
• when people bring food and drinks into the special collections reading room even though I specifically told them not to. You're not special and our rules do apply to you.
• gods just remembering that time a girl put a FRESH PEELED COCONUT on an ARCHIVAL BOX and it left a WET STAIN on it still gives me rage of the librarian variety. I'm having angina just thinking about it
• when I have to be at work for something first thing in the morning right after I've worked a night shift
• when people studying in the library don't throw away their trash or clean up crumbs, etc. ESTE NO ES UN HOTEL!
• when people studying in the library don't turn off the lamps they've been using when they leave and then I have to because no one else cares
• when someone comes to talk to me at the reference desk but they stand at the side of the desk instead of coming to the front of the desk in front of me like a normal person, even though there's no one there. like wtf???
• when my coworkers send out passive aggressive emails that are totally aimed at me
• when people are suuuuper slow to leave at closing time. Like I've already rung the buzzer and flicked the lights on and off and told you personally that we're closing. This isn't a store or restaurant where they close the doors but let you hang out for longer, just LEAVE already. 
• shoutout to the patron who kept trying to have a conversation with me ten minutes after closing time in the face of my repeatedly telling her we were closed and she had to leave 
• 
• also shoutout to the patron, who when I straight up told him we were closing and he needed to leave, asked me if he could have a couple minutes more. *John Mulaney voice and face* NO!
• when people ask me "are you busy?" at the reference desk. Yes, I am busy, I have specifically chosen to work here on this very public desk in the library labeled "REFERENCE DESK" where other librarians have helped you before/which is where your instructor told you to go get research help on my own personal project, it's not like the main/most important thing in the library is helping patrons or anything, I'm definitely going to turn you away
• like honestly I'm just social media-ing in the times between helping people 
• forreal dude just roll up and ask me your question
• when I see a student hovering near the desk while I'm already helping someone and I say "do you have a quick question?" and the student says "yes, I need help with [finding sources for their paper, something that is going to take at least fifteen minutes and for which they are definitely going to have to wait for me to be finished with the student I'm currently helping, obviously, don't play]"
• when a student asks me if we have a certain book. I realize this is very standard in libraries, but these are Gen Z students who absolutely know how to use the internet, there is no way they don't know about the library catalog because we make all freshmen do a library scavenger hunt and/or we've personally demonstrated how to look up books and articles in their classes, just go to the library website and click on Library Catalog, my dude
• I don't typically mind this but it's annoying when I'm helping someone else with a real research question
• when students walk allll the way from the back of the room where the printers are to the reference desk at the front of the room to ask for help with some tech problem when they could have just asked the computer lab worker, who is situated at the middle of the room in an obvious separate desk, for help
• when I catch students getting physical in the study rooms. Gross. Like hello, these are STUDY rooms, do not "get a room" here. ESTE NO ES UN HOTEL! 
• the same goes for couples getting cozy on our giant bean bag. Like do you want to have to tell the admin assistant you got body fluids on the bean bag? Because I'm not going to be the one to do that, lovebirds.
• when students are loud
• when the printers don't work
• when the student workers get too comfortable and treat their shifts like a social hour or study time only. You're here to work, so even if there's not a whole lot for you to do, look around and see if anyone at the printers looks like they need help, computer worker
• when people (especially student workers, who should know better) listen to music or videos without headphones, or when they have the headphones but the audio is WAY TOO LOUD and the sound is still very audible
• when the wifi doesn't work, which is MOST OF THE TIME!!! This is a UNIVERSITY and a UNIVERSITY LIBRARY besides!! Students come here to study!! Like WTF!!!
• when I contact IT about this and they're like hurr durr we can't do anything
• when it's too cold or hot
• and we don't even have control over the temperature in our own library!!! Freaking physical plant department does, and of course they can't be arsed
• when people ask me for stuff with a very "you're The Help and I'm your boss" kind of energy
• you know, like this is The Devil Wears Prada and they're Meryl Streep and I'm Anne Hathaway. Just like spiritually/mentally flinging their designer coat into my face
• Like obviously I'm going to help you! That is my job! I just don't like them putting on classist airs about it
• obviously all of the typical librarian and archivist pet peeves apply too 
• when people ask me for things they've already asked me for, especially if it's something I had to work to get, such as a thesis from an obscure part of the archives area. Like did you not read the email I sent you? We've been over this? Hello?
• when people come talk to me for no reason (depends on my mood). If it's not information based, I don't know how to handle conversations, and you're wasting my time and the time of anyone waiting for me to be available for questions.
• I'm especially thinking of white baby boomer men. White baby boomer men are soooo annoying because they think they are so charming and funny, and they usually aren't. I hate the stupid jokes they make. I'm a huge target for them at that front-facing desk, as any young woman in the service industries knows.
• when someone incredibly technologically ignorant is trying to do something at the computers and keeps asking me questions about the simplest things. I know it's not their fault but it's still annoying to me. Like ma'am, you should know how to how to use email if you're in college/applying for a job. I especially dislike when they ask me for help every 30-60 seconds and make me get up from my desk every time instead of just admitting they're going to need my help for every single step of the way and can I please sit with them and help them. Like let's be real here.

Expensive makeup that sucks

all hail Freckle

With high-end makeup, the packaging is almost always nicer, but the quality isn't always better. Prestige brand eyeliners are worse than drugstore brand eyeliners. I have purchased eyeliner pencils from Buxum and Urban Decay, and I hate them.

• They are too thick/wide and do not come to a point when sharpened
• they come off onto my fingers when I touch my eyes despite longevity claims
• the supposedly long-wearing eyeliners migrate to my undereyes regardless of my air conditioned climate, giving me raccoon eyes 
• despite this they are EXTREMELY difficult to remove with most makeup wipes and removers, forcing me to scrub at my delicate eye skin
• The Buxom eyeliner is a dry and thick consistency and pulls on my eyelids
• The UD pencils do glide on but irritate my eyes when I use them on the waterline. What is the purpose of a so-called 24/7 long-wearing waterproof eyeliner pencil that cannot be used on the waterline????? 

These disappointments cost $17 and $22 each, respectively. The UD pencils were in a set that was on sale, but still.

I've also used a mini size of the Marc Jacobs Highliner Gel Eye Crayon (full size $25), which was probably the worst eyeliner I've ever used. It had all of the same problems as listed above, plus it wouldn't even do a complete line on my eyelid because it was so dry and patchy. You could argue that the full size would be better quality, but mini sizes of prestige makeup items are given away as gifts with purchases in order to get you to fall in love with them and buy the full-sized product, so I don't think that argument holds up. I had the exact same issues with the terrible mini IT Cosmetics' No-Tug Waterproof Anti-Aging Gel Eyeliner ($22 full size). It definitely tugged, and that probably made my eyes age.

My Rimmel kohl/scandaleyes eyeliners, which are like $5, glide on like a dream and stay fairly well. So do Colourpop's eyeliner pencils, which are $5.50.

I've also bought a Too Faced liquid eyeliner marker, which was like $17, and it:

• was extremely watery 
• lacked almost all pigment
• dried up in the tube incredibly soon

My Physicians Formula liquid eyeliner pen, however, is like $11 and is so much better (it even has a brush tip!).

While it worked fine, I found that IT Cosmetics' "universal" brow pencil ($24 full size) was too grey and light for my dark brown eyebrows. For that, you're better off using one of Nyx or L.A. Girl or e.l.f.'s eyebrow pencils, which you can get to match your eyebrow color and only pay $3-10.

I follow beauty vloggers, and I've heard several of them rave about Ofra Cosmetics liquid lipsticks and how long-lasting they were. Ulta had a sale once, so I bought a couple.

• They did not dry down, despite being a thin formula and being given plenty of time. 
• They disappeared at the first touch of food or drink. I'm talking completely disappearing when I drank some water, no ring around the lips even. It was as if it had never been applied.
• They transferred on my fingers, cup, etc.
• They did not last, at all. 

They were $18 full price, and I bought them for $9 on sale!! I returned them. So disappointing, since the colors were gorgeous.

I was also disappointed at Stila's "stay all day" liquid lipstick ($22). I put it over lipliner and it gave me ring-around-the-lips after eating. I tried it alone and it still didn't last through food.

It was the same with Kaja's "high-pigment lip stain" ($18), which was more of a moussey liquid lipstick. I put it on and went to a potluck 15 minutes later, and it was gone. It didn't even stain my lips. It's supposed to be matte, but it wasn't really that either.

The Urban Decay Vice liquid lipstick in the shade Purgatory was patchy, drying and uncomfortable. Wet N Wild has a liquid lipstick in a similar dark metallic burgundy shade, and even if it's just as bad, it's only $5.

If it's not going to be long-lasting and will come off anyway, I recommend Colourpop's liquid lipsticks ($6 or so) or Nyx's liquid lipsticks ($5-9). Heck, Wet N Wild and e.l.f. have liquid lipsticks and they're like $5 too. There are a few drugstore brands that have actual long-wearing liquid lipsticks, such as CoverGirl and Maybelline. These come with special lip balms or clear glosses to extend the liquid lipstick's life, and are usually around $10.

Have you noticed that high-end lipsticks' bullets are shorter than drugstore lipsticks? I haven't been able to compare every single brand out there, but my Too Faced and Bésame Cosmetics lipsticks' ($17-25) bullets are shorter than my Wet N Wild and Essence lipsticks ($1-5).

Physicians Formula is a drugstore brand, but its Murumuru Butter Blushes are expensive ($13). I tried the lightest shade, which was a lovely natural soft pink in the pan, and it was so pale it wouldn't show up on me. It wasn't shimmery enough to use as a highlighter, either. What a disappointment. The shimmery pink blush I bought from e.l.f., however, is $3 and looks great. To be fair, I have also bought a pale pink shimmery blush from e.l.f. before that was too pale to be a blush and not shimmery enough to be a highlighter, but the disappointment was less because I only paid $1.

Bobbi Brown's Retouching Face Pencil ($35!!), which was clearly made to be used as a highlighter, was very dry and chunky-glittery, and didn't look good on the face. Wet N Wild and e.l.f. have some very nice and cheap highlighter sticks/crayons that glow and shimmer beautifully.

It's like some lady said on the internet, at the end of the day it all goes down the drain (as you wash your face), so you might as well save your money.

Indignities suffered by bridesmaids

thank God I didn't have to deal with wearing an ugly bridesmaid gown on top of everything else

I have just finished being a bridesmaid for the third and probably final time, as all of my siblings and close friends are married, and I am currently hunched over my keyboard at work, makeup-less and haggard, nursing pain in my shoulders, arms, and back for some reason, and thinking about all the awful things I had to endure yesterday as a bridesmaid.

Groomsmen have to spend a lot of money to rent a tuxedo or a 2-3 piece suit, and those can get hot during warm weddings, but their misery is nothing compared to ours. I have gone to hell and back.

My brother got married on a mountain, and it rained throughout. I was wet, cold, and shivering for most of the event, except for when I was seated in the reception tent next to a heater set to full blast. That's that I was wearing leggings under my dress. My sister could not, as her dress had a slit in it. When we were carted to and from the bridal suite on golf carts by the event staff (greatly appreciated and vastly better than walking in our heels), we were splashed by the falling rain and the water on the ground, and the ups and downs of the cart route meant we were in constant fear of falling off of it. Once my sister (also a bridesmaid) and I sat in the back seat, and the rain dripped off the roof at the center in a fairly solid stream, which my sister tried to deflect with an umbrella, but the stream just ran off the umbrella into my lap. I almost didn't notice due to how cold it was. It was about 50 degrees Fahrenheit at that point. Both entering and departing the golf cart soaked my long dress's hem, and I spent the entire wedding with about 3-6 inches of my dress hem wet. The rain frizzed my hair. At one point we had to take bridal party photos next to the barn the ceremony took place in, and the rain ran off the roof and down my back into my bridesmaid gown. I had to change my position for the picture and the rain hit my shoulder and ran down my chest into the front of my gown. At no point were we allowed to wear our coats during the picture taking. It was anywhere from 50 to 38 degrees that day, and you could see people's breath. One girl already had a cold; no allowances were made for her.

 My sister was married only a couple of miles from our brother's venue on the same mountain, a few days later than yesterday's wedding date (albeit six years before), and it was very bright and sunny. I got a sunburn on my back and shoulders, and the bridesmaid gown's straps left a pale, prominent crisscross pattern on my lobster back.

In the last wedding I was in, my other brother's, I wore these elegant high heels in my perfect nude shade. I forgot to bring flats, so I had to stay in them during the entire wedding, and my toes were numb for a month. I specifically spent several weeks looking for comfortable nude high-heeled sandals for this wedding, determined not to experience that level of discomfort again. The new shoes I bought were light tan high-heeled sandals by Naturalizer, a very good brand specializing in comfortable shoes. They have a medium-height heel with a 1-2 cm thickness at the front part of the shoe in order to alleviate the height of the heel, a sturdy construction with a padded insole. They hurt my feet anyway. I do think it is important to get high heels that will support and cushion your feet as much as comfortable, but human beings are not meant to wear high heels for hours on end, and that is sadly expected of women at formal functions. For my sister's wedding, we wore flats with a small stacked wedge heel. They still hurt my feet. Also uncomfortable: shapewear.

There have been myriad articles written about the expected tasks of bridesmaids, who must pay upwards of $100 for their bridesmaid dresses, as well as shoes and other accessories, as well as pay for travel expenses and presents for both the wedding and the bachelorette party (which they often plan, and for which there can be an entrance fee, depending on where it is held). Buying a bridesmaid dress from a wedding clothing retailer sucks because they're $100-200+, and being given a swatch of fabric and told to find a dress that matches that color sucks because you spend hours scouring the racks at discount and department stores, and it gives you a slight PWSD (post wedding stress disorder) for months afterwards, causing you to twitch every time you see a dress on the rack that could have been a possible bridesmaids dress for months afterwards. I paid $75 plus tip for a shampoo, haircut (trim) and blowout. I am very lucky in that my mother paid for my manicure and pedicure and my bridesmaid dress for every sibling's wedding that I have been in. Some bridesmaids are expected to pay for a professional hairdresser and/or makeup artist to beautify them for the wedding.

No one has written about the awkwardness of sharing a small room or cabin with several other women one does not know very well, having to change and be in various states of undress in front of near-strangers, and politely maneuvering about the most coveted spots (mirrors and bathrooms) to change and do one's makeup in. It is worst if you are a sister of the groom and all the other girls are close friends of the bride and therefore naturally cliquish, or if you are a friend of the bride and all the other girls are related to her/him and/or each other, and naturally close. I usually belong to the former group, and in these instances I have thanked my lucky stars that I have a sister to share the awkwardness with. I have no idea what I would have done with myself had I not had my sister to talk to during both of my brothers' weddings. Some girls are friendlier than others, and the bride is usually too busy to be the intermediary.

Every time I have a bachelorette party to go to, I go to Victoria's Secret because I know of no other place to purchase lingerie. For some reason I feel that it is kind of embarrassing and tacky to buy lingerie at a department store (you are not immune to propaganda, etc.). Every time I purchase lingerie at Victoria's Secret, I have to lie down: one bra and one panty costs nearly as much as my car insurance monthly payment. (Worth googling: "victoria's secret prison labor" and "victoria's secret slave labor".) It is egregious. Not to mention, Victoria's Secret stores are extremely garish, loud, overtly sexual, and confusing to navigate. They are also embarrassing for anyone who has any sense of propriety, has been discouraged from thinking about sex/taught to see sex in a negative light due to a conservative religious upbringing, or is uncomfortable with sexuality in general. Unfortunately, I am all of these. I always buy a matching bra and panty because then I can cling to the belief that they will be worn as normal underclothing and not for sex. What, is that weird? This whole thing is weird, buddy. Where have you been?

It strikes me that being a bridesmaid is a perfect example of femininity in this society: very dressed up, made up, and feminine, but still doing a lot of unpaid labor, both physical and emotional, yet expected to look and act perfectly, with the goal of fulfilling some oft-maligned female position, all out of love.

Anyway, here is a bullet point list of other, more specific to me indignities that I have suffered as a bridesmaid or maid of honor:

• had to share the position of maid of honor with another girl (it's the bride's choice! But it still hurt a little)
• was extremely indignant at the other maid of honor when she got married later on and didn't have two maids of honor for fear of hurting her sister's feelings. There is no justice in life.
• another girl planned the bachelorette party for the bride (admittedly much better than I ever could have) even though I was the maid of honor
• was once excluded from a bachelorette party even though I was a bridesmaid
• looked and looked for a dress to wear as a bridesmaid in a specific color that was impossible to find on the rack, broke down and bought the dress at full price from David's Bridal, then learned another bridesmaid found her David's Bridal dress at a thrift store for a few dollars
• had to sit at the traditional long bridal party table between/next to people I did not know very well 
• had to dance at the reception as a means to encouraging wedding guests to dance. They just looked on, and I was exposed as the bad, zumba-inspired dancer that I really am
• was paired with the shortest groomsman (I'm rather tall)
• was paired with groomsmen who had little to no interest in talking to me (one even ignored me during the entire event)
• was paired with a groomsman who dropped my arm the second he was able to, like I had cooties or something
• all the groomsmen who are not related to me have girlfriends or are married (it's not their fault but I still feel a little affronted)
• tbh, movies and pop culture have put it in my head that bridesmaids frequently find romantic prospects at a wedding, whether it is with a groomsman or with a wedding guest, and this has never ever happened to me, not even once
• having to deal with the thought that the only reason I'm a bridesmaid is because I'm related to the bride/groom, and I don't have any friends
• being the tallest bridesmaid
• being the oldest bridesmaid
• being the fattest bridesmaid
• being the most single bridesmaid
• being the fattest, oldest, tallest, most single bridesmaid
• was never given the chance to be a bridesmaid in the first place

Despite all this complaining, I really do love being a bridesmaid. Being a bridesmaid is almost better than being a wedding guest, because you get to feel special and important, and it creates a faux friend group for you to be a part of. Also I love getting to be in professional photoshoots for mostly free. I love weddings; I love love. Weddings are so lovely and exciting, and I love being a part of them and of someone's special day.

Storage hacks that suck

I live in a very small house (I hesitate to call it a tiny house because those are smaller), so I am always looking out for ideas to maximize space, usually on Pinterest. I've read the vast majority of the hacks out there, and many of them are useless due to the way my house is set up. Here's what I mean:

1. Hang organizers from your doors! I have exactly two doors in my house. One is the front door, and one is the bathroom door. I am loath to hang organizers on either. It would look weird on the front door, and I have never seen or heard of anyone putting organizers on their front door. There is a towel rack attached to the back (inside) of my bathroom door, as well as some hooks, keeping me from putting a hanging organizer there. I also think it would look weird to put it on the outward side of the door, since guests (and anyone who looks through the windows) will see it. Such is my dire need of places to store my shoes that I would consider putting an over the door organizer on my bathroom door anyway, except for the main reason: these organizers always come with thick metal square hooks to hang them from the top of the door. These are always too thick to let you close the door properly, because whoever first came up with them did so in a time in which all doors had a 1/4 inch gap all around (I'm guessing) and no one has changed the dimensions since, even though now the gaps are 1/8th of an inch or less. I live alone and don't mind having the door ajar when I use the restroom, but it's awkward when guests come over. I had an over the door organizer on my bathroom door in my last apartment, and when my private father needed to use the restroom, he forced it closed and ripped twin chunks from the door frame. I was worried I wouldn't get my deposit back, but luckily the landlord didn't look up. As you can see I don't want to go through that again. Plus a non-ugly shoe organizer/rack is hard to find unless you want to spend a lot of money, which I never do. I have two closets, but they have heavy folding doors with handle pulls right in the middle of the narrow panels. It's a nightmare. 
2. Store things under your bed! Listen, my bed is approximately two centimeters from the floor. It is a nice-enough modern bed with squat plastic feet and a padded headboard that is so short it is blocked by my pillow, since I have a box spring and a mattress and I think the manufacturers assumed everyone would just use a mattress. Use bed raisers! Pinterest yells at me. My bed's squat plastic feet? Are shaped like rectangles on their sides. All bed raisers are built for round or square bed feet, even though low-slung beds have been having a moment for some years and you'd think someone would get a lightbulb over their head and make bed raisers for rectangular feet. But no, I am doomed to have (four centimeters of) wasted space under there. I briefly thought of resting the feet (plus the hidden one in the middle) on cement blocks, but what if the legs slipped off? I don't know how to make that stable. Oh, how I wish I hadn't been seduced by the low price and padded headboard and bought a bed that was actually high enough to slide my under the bed rolling organizer under. I actually wish I had had the brains to buy a storage bed with drawers underneath and a bookcase for a headboard. That would have been ideal. 
3. Hang organizers/pot lids on the inside of your kitchen cabinet doors! Do none of you have shelves in the middle of your cabinets that go all the way to the front of the cabinet? There is just not enough space there. 
4. Store dishes and pot lids vertically, or on a stacking organizer! Use shelf risers! Again, shelves in the middle of all but my below the sink cabinets. I guess I could try taking the shelf off its supports in one of my bigger cabinets, but it sounds like a pain. 
5. Use the wasted space above your doors! My ceilings are incredibly low. I can just reach up and touch the ceiling downstairs without any effort, and I've whacked the upstairs ceiling several times when taking my shirt off over my head. I think it's 6.25 feet high, and maybe 6.5 feet high downstairs. There is no space above the doorways, let alone wasted space.
6. Any kind of modification that requires actual construction: this is a rental??? I mean I wish I could install a tiny broom closet between the studs of my house, or build under-stairs shelves that you can pull out, or hang cubbies on the wall. I'm not even supposed to be using that many pushpins for my pictures. 
7. Use an old chest or trunk as a coffee table! My "living room" area is so small I can't have any coffee table at all. I have one ottoman and it's against the foot of my lounge.
8. Use the dead space behind doors! See #1. Also, my doors don't have that kind of dead space behind them. 
9. Install shelves or rails below your kitchen cabinets! Low ceilings strike again. I have narrow counters as well. 
10. This is not an impossibility, but I kind of hate articles that suggest you get all-new furniture. What do I look like, a Vanderbilt? I have half a dozen chests of drawers from 2 different childhood bedroom sets as well as the childhood bedroom set of a cousin's cousin (hand-me-down squared!). My chaise lounge and plastic storage drawer unit were inherited from my grandma, my table and chairs from my best friend when she moved, and my garment rack from my parents or my sister. The only new furniture pieces are my bed, my bookshelves, my other plastic drawer units and my kitchen cart, all of which were scooped at low prices. Do I look like I have money to buy all-clear furniture, or furniture with hairpin legs? What I get is what I have. 

Anyway. I'll stick to trying to wring as much storage space out of my tiny weird closets as I can. Share any tips you have in the comments.