Africa by Toto covers

"Africa", a song by the band Toto, is one of the greatest songs in the Western canon.

this music video has a weird and colonial energy but there's books and a hot librarian in it

For some reason. Toto gave their blessing to '90s has-been band Weezer to cover "Africa". Weezer has had some very nice songs I enjoyed in my youth, but their "Africa" cover does not live up to them or the original. The Weezer cover sounds like their moms are making them do it. They're preforming the song with the sulky, adequate but lackluster energy of a student in a recital they didn't actually want to do but found no way out of. Even the instrumentals have the same meh energy. Whenever I hear the Weezer cover of "Africa", I wish I were listening to the original instead.

Deeply boring music video. Weird Al Yankovic is in it and they clip his wings and reduce him to dressing up like Stephen Colbert. What's the point of having Weird Al in your music video if you don't even use him properly!!!

You may argue that the point of a song cover is not to do it exactly the same, but to bring something new, even fresh and/or exciting, to the song. Weezer does not do that either. It's like they're a wedding band forced to play some song they think they're too cool for because it was specifically requested by the bride and groom. There is no zest or joy, and not being able to find joy in Toto's "Africa" is like if the sun came up and it was a dark sun, etc.

The cover of "Africa" by the weirdly-named Ninja Sex Party is 100 times better. They have the energy and coolness necessary to do this song justice. Even the instrumentals (which are not identical to the original) are played with great energy and cheer. I enjoyed listening to this cover nearly as much as I enjoy listening to the original.

This is fine. I appreciate that they didn't go for the obvious

One thing I have noticed in the covers of "Africa" (the two above; I haven't sought out the no-doubt countless YouTube amateur covers) is that the bands covering them think that they need to sing the high part of the chorus the loudest. The high part is not the main part; it is a harmony. All vocal parts of the chorus should be sung at the same volume/force, or the high and lower parts should be but one step behind the main middle part, in a manner of speaking. The Weezer vocalists sing the middle and lower harmonies so low they are inaudible. When it comes on on the radio, I am forced to sing the middle part myself in order to at least attempt to salvage the chorus. It is very discomforting and keeps me from fully enjoying the song.

"Africa" by Toto : 5 out of 5 stars
"Africa" covered by Weezer:  2.5 stars
"Africa" covered by Ninja Sex Party : 4 stars

Recipe: easy breezy healthiful salad

I'm pretty sure I got this recipe from HelloFresh, or possibly Pinterest. It is my favorite salad to make because there is minimal chopping.

• garbanzo beans
• diced or cubed cucumbers
• corn kernels (optional)
• avocado, diced
• feta cheese, diced
• drizzle of olive oil
• lemon juice (optional)
• salt and pepper (ground if possible)

I like to have an equal ratio of garbanzo beans, cucumber pieces, and corn if I'm using it (1:1:1).  The amount of feta cheese and avocado will depend on the amount of veggies* you have, but I definitely don't recommend overdoing it on the feta cheese. Maybe do two-thirds to half as much feta as 1 ratio** of veggies, and at least half a veggie-ratio of avocado, if not more. The size of the drizzle of olive oil will depend on how big your salad is and how oily you like things, and if you're adding lemon juice, use an amount that is roughly equal to the amount of olive oil. The salt and pepper are to taste. You can omit the feta cheese to make this vegan!

If using canned garbanzo beans or corn, drain and rinse them, then let them drip dry. You can peel the cucumbers if you prefer, then chop them up however you see fit, although I don't recommend slices, and throw them in a bowl. Cut up the avocado and feta cheese and throw that in too, along with the garbanzo beans and corn if using. Drizzle the olive oil and lemon juice (if using) and add the salt and pepper. Stir vigorously so that the avocado and feta cheese will get mushed and mix with the oil and juice. Eat.


*yes, I'm aware garbanzos are legumes and cucumbers are fruit. Also avocados are technically berries because this is a world that we have to wrest good things from. idk.
**no I don't remember how ratios work. Leave me alone.

Book review: A Life in Stitches: Knitting my way through love, loss, and laughter by Rachael Herron

Following a trend, A Life in Stitches was a dollar store find. I was kind of on the fence about it but decided to buy it since I like to knit. I am so glad I did, because I really enjoyed this book!

Rachael Herron was (is?) the author of a popular knitting blog, back when blogs were the thing, and she's been knitting since she was young. Here is the Amazon summary:

When life unravels, there’s always a way to knit it back together again, many times into something even better. Honest, funny, and full of warmth, Herron’s tales, each inspired by something she knit or something knit for her, will speak to anyone who has ever picked up a pair of needles. From her very first sweater (a hilarious disaster, to say the least) to the yellow afghan that caused a breakup (and, ultimately, a breakthrough), every piece has a moving story behind it. This beautifully crafted and candid collection is perfect for the knitter who loves to read and the reader who loves to knit.

I loved this book. Herron is a really great writer, and she's skilled at putting you right in the situation she's describing and making you feel what she felt. Despite not knowing she existed before I picked up this book, I warmed to her immediately and enjoyed the glimpses into her life. She doesn't shy away from sharing embarrassing or painful events that happened to her, and readily shares any insight she gleaned from the experiences. Herron shares stories about her family, her experiences dating and falling in love with both men and women, and how she met her wife. I loved the essay about Venice, one of her favorite cities in the world.  It really made me want to visit Venezia again.

Surprisingly, there is only one knitting pattern in this book: a pattern for a hot water bottle cozy. There are obviously tons of descriptions of different things Herron has knitted over the years. Some are seriously complex and difficult! She knitted everything in the cover picture, and has even taken up spinning (yes, like Sleeping Beauty with the wheel). This book made me want to start knitting again and look up the closest yarn shop. I would definitely recommend this book to to anyone who likes knitting or memoirs.

Score: 5 out of 5 stars
Read in: January 17
From: dollar store
Format: hardcover
Status: keeping

Book review: Darcy Swipes Left by Courtney Carbone & Jane Austen

Darcy Swipes Left is part of the OMG Classics series by Courtney Carbone, who restructures classic works of literature into online/texting conversations and social media status updates with plenty of emojis. I found it at the dollar store, and since I collect Jane Austen adaptations, I decided to buy it.

I did not really care for this book. The use of emojis to replace words, often to confusing effect, was rather corny. There is a glossary in the back to explain the text speech/acronyms, for anyone older than 45, and what the emojis meant. Per usual, I did not realize this until I finished the book, so I had to guess what each emoji stood for, which was not always immediately obvious (flirting is the winky face + blowing a kiss w/ a heart emoji). The emotions of the book don't really come through when they're transmitted via text. I was kind of secondhand embarrassed throughout, tbh. I don't think this will be the kind of book that ages gracefully. Gen Z doesn't use Facebook, for instance, and I think people have stopped checking into places online.

Ok, here are some positive things about this book: most of the humor shines through, and you still get to see Lizzy dunk on Darcy. My favorite part is when Lydia goes to stay with her married friend, and she uploads a 150-picture album entitled "Selfies with Soldiers" to Facebook.

I haven't given it away (yet), but idk if I will end up keeping it after all. Probably not, as I'm already running out of space on my Jane Austen Shelf.

Score: 2.5 out of 5 stars
Read in: January 16
From: dollar store
Format: hardcover
Status: tentatively keeping

Book review: The Other Log of Phileas Fogg by Phillip Jose Farmer

I found The Other Log of Phileas Fogg at the dollar store. It sounded vaguely interesting, so I bought it. It's a retelling of the Jules Verne classic Around the World in 80 Days, and I typically like retellings and Verne novels. Requisite Amazon summary:

In a delicious slice of sci-fi whimsy that sits cleverly alongside Verne's original tale, Phileas Fogg's epic global journey is not the product of a daft wager but, in fact, a covert mission to chase down the elusive Captain Nemo - who is none other than Professor Moriarty.
A secret alien war has raged on Earth for years and is about to culminate in this epic race.
A novel in the Wold Newton universe, in which characters such as Sherlock Holmes, Flash Gordon, Doc Savage, James Bond and Jack the Ripper are all mysteriously connected.

Weird, right? I felt it was pretty reaching. I know I have little creativity or writerly instincts of my own, but it feels weird and sort of lazy to me to take a classic work of literature and just like shoehorn random crap into it to make a book of your own (aka Pride & Prejudice & Zombies), or insist that the author TOTALLY meant something with their work that you know they did not (aka The Jane Austen Rules: A Classic Guide to Modern Love or Planet Narnia). Farmer started to lose me the second he said that Captain Nemo was the same person as Moriarty. Like come on. I like a mashup, but that's a bit much.

The writing style was very dense, and there were a lot of action scenes where it was kind of hard to understand what was going on. I know Farmer was trying to sound Verne-like, but this was even denser than Verne, IMO. There was this communication device that I did not realize was also a transporter (beam me up etc.) until like 2/3rds of the way through the book. At least Aouda turned out to be a great sharpshooter, rather than just a damsel in distress. You also have to have read Around the World in 80 Days immediately before reading this book, or you will be confused as to what's going on. 

Farmer ends the book by slyly pointing out he and Phineas Fogg have the same initials, which segues us into an essay at the end of the book by some other sci fi writer that said a meteor hit a part of England where people like Tarzan, Sherlock Holmes, Moriarty, the Scarlet Pimpernel and Darcy and Elizabeth Bennett (or their relatives) were hanging out in, and that's why they're all amazing and have superpowers or whatever. Oh, and they're all related, including Farmer. What kind of English Meteor Extended Universe?? That's another level, to put the author himself into it. Yikes. 

Cover notes: the airship (?) does not come into the book or have anything to do with it.

Score: 3.5 out of 5 stars
Read in: January 9-10
From: dollar store
Format: paperback
Status: giving away

I was in the bathroom when they handed out...

1. social skills
2. sex appeal
3. puberty
4. regular-sized foreheads
5. athletic ability
6. good balance
7. self control
8. the knowledge of what to do in social situations
9. good, even teeth
10. the ability to make friends without some sort of scaffolding such as school
11. melanin
12. confidence
13. mental fortitude
14. math skills (higher than simple algebra)
15. decisiveness
16. perseverance
17. energy
18. the desire, knowledge, and ability to network
19. the appeal, knowledge, and ability to date
20. courage

Books read in 2018

• Total books read during this year: 33
• Total books that I started to read but didn't finish: 5
• physical books read: 33
• ebooks read: 0
• physical books started but unfinished: 3
• ebooks started but unfinished: 2
• Library books read: 3
• Library books started but unread: 1
• Books I liked: 24
• Books I loved: 0
• Books I hated: 1 but it was one I didn't finish
• Books I disliked or found meh: 7
• Books I felt strongly about but can't classify under love or hate: 1
• Books given away: 15 (I'm including the books I got from the free books rack from the library and then immediately returned to the rack after reading them)

I read fewer books this year, partly because I had a class I had to use my ref desk downtime to study for, and partly because I just felt less up to reading (hence this post). I had a pretty busy spring and summer with a lot of traveling, as well. I am going to try to read more so I can get rid of books I don't really want, and also because I think I'm happier when I read. I have been buying a lot of books brand-new from Barnes & Noble, and I want to stop doing that to save money. I still have so many books from thrift stores and the like that I should be reading, and I feel like I should check out library books if I want to read something I don't have. Can you believe I've lived here two years and still haven't seen my local library or gotten a library card there? 

Just went over my list again and the books I liked/loved/hated/disliked don't add up to the books I read. Oh well.

November & December books

I decided to just do short book reviews for the 2018 books I hadn't reviewed yet.

Where Am I Now? True Stories of Girlhood and Accidental Fame by Mara Wilson (early November).
I loved Mara Wilson's movies growing up, and she's really funny on social media nowadays, so I bought her memoir from Barnes & Noble and was excited to read it (which means it sat on my bookshelf for a year). While it wasn't the laugh-fest I imagined, I really enjoyed this book. Mara explores her child star status, her struggle with OCD and anxiety, her awkward adolescence, and how the deaths of her mother and Robin Williams impacted her. It was like a window into her life, and I'd like to be friends with her.  ~~~~~ 4/5, keep


 Dandelion Wine by Ray Bradbury (mid-November to early December)
I loved The Martian Chronicles when I read it for a sci fi class, so I bought this book when I came across it in a thrift store. Ray Bradbury has just the loveliest writing; everything he writes is a work of art. This book is a love letter to his midwest childhood in the 1920s, while also mythologizing it and imbuing it with sci fi elements and mystery. Some examples: an old woman who hoards objects from her long life is convinced she has always been an old lady by the local children; an old woman recognizes the love of her life as being reincarnated in his grandson, and a heatstruck boy is brought back to life by bottled air from cold lands, sold by a peddler. The only thing I didn't like about this book was the creepy element of a serial killer, which is treated like high adventure by the boys, and it was just too flippant for me.   ~~~~~ 4/5, probably give away


The Nutcracker by Alexandre Dumas (Christmas eve)
I bought a copy of the Nutcracker story in a beautiful binding from Barnes & Noble. I read the story as a child, although I'm not sure it was the Dumas version. It's pretty weird. This one starts out with the author at a Christmas party at a friend's house. He sneaks away from playing with the kids to take a nap, but wakes up tied to the chair. The kids agree to release him only if he tells him a story, so he tells them "the history of the Nutcracker". It's not at all a story that would entertain children, as it's way too long and tied up in weird bureaucratic and historical details, with the kind of long-winded and rambling writing typical of the 18/19th century. Clara is supposed to be 7 and a half and she's this perfect little lady who is always sweet and kind and acts way older than her age. What's insane to me is that at the end, the Nutcracker marries her after a year has passed. She's only 8 and a half at that point!! So weird.  ~~~~~ 3.5/5, keep

Christmas In My Heart 1 ed. Joe L. Wheeler (Christmas)
Every year Joe L. Wheeler puts out another compilation of Christmas stories from the good old days. Each one has stories from the Victorian era through maybe the 1960s, chock full of adorable precocious children, forlorn but cheerful orphans who find a home, lonely people finding each other, people learning the true meaning of Christmas, separated couples getting back together, and occasionally nice white people helping brown/foreign children. It's all very treacley. At the end of each one is a long sweeping story by Joe L. Wheeler himself that is full of romance between beautiful/handsome Christians and involves either music or books and is bound to give you diabetes. I've read at least four of the CIMH books and they're all the same. My mother gives the new one to my father each year, and we are at volume 27. When will Joe L. Wheeler's reign of terror end?  ~~~~ 3.9/5